“If there is no struggle, there is no progress.”
Health and fitness is one of the core tenants of our D/s dynamic. Earlier this year, this boy wrote about how we incorporated health and fitness into our dynamic, and the rituals we use to share progress and stay on track. Here, Sir’s boy will elaborate on how things are progressing with a focus on what has worked and what hasn’t and some adjustments we are making along the way.
The first step in our health and fitness dynamic was setting goals. Sir’s long term goals for us are written to be achievable in a one year timeframe. With half the year over, we’re learning that setting short term goals is equally as important as long term goals. For example, this boy has an approved goal to improve cardiovascular health and endurance, but at this point in the year, this boy has not made significant progress in this area. Setting a short term goal to run x miles per week, or to get into the boxing gym x times per week would be a way to make progress while working towards the long-term goal achievement. So, having short term focused goal milestones that support our long term goals has been necessary for us to make consistent measurable progress.
Tracking is an important aspect of our dynamic, and seeing measurable progress towards goals is critical for motivation and focus. However, focusing primarily on muscle growth leaves blind spots that don’t highlight forward progress in other areas. We have found it equally important to measure habits that lead to long term growth. For example, measuring weekly pushups completed has helped this boy understand how progress towards overall improved chest growth is working towards achieving Sir’s approved goal. So, we have found that measuring things that lead to good habits in addition to body measures results in better long-term development.
We have added service aspects to our dynamic, and many have fallen flat. For example, we experimented with this boy providing Sir with workouts He can complete. We also experimented with this boy making protein shakes for Sir after His workouts. These attempts have failed to contribute to our overall dynamic due to scheduling or other issues making service inconsistent or impractical. Our finding is that we need to spend more time up front discussing service ideas to make sure they are practical and contribute to our overall dynamic. Otherwise, service can lead to inconsistency, and inconsistency erodes the quality of a D/s dynamic very quickly.
Rituals and scenes have been vital to our dynamic. Our monthly measurement and reporting scene is key to leveling on expectations and for setting future direction. A key discovery for this boy is that waiting a full month to discuss progress is not enough to keep the dynamic juices flowing. This is an area where we are leaning in and making adjustments. For example, this boy now has weekly short-term goals where progress is shared online with the community. Boy s37 believes there is also an opportunity to start sharing this with Sir so that there is improved visibility. In addition, this boy has started to share a daily workout plan and schedule with Sir during our AM ritual. This has been a major improvement to keep our health & fitness dynamic present and top of mind each day. Sharing this with Sir daily keeps His boy accountable and increases vulnerability thus improving headspace that contributes to the overall D/s dynamic. A key takeaway is that you can’t discuss this stuff enough. Be willing to go the distance and increase your vulnerability so that it improves your headspace.
Our latest focus is on establishing service with a focus on what works for us. It is of vital importance for this sub to feel he is providing service to Sir that He appreciates and that this boy can be successful delivering. We have been focused on areas of power exchange and discussing ideas at great length where we both have common interest (more on this in a future post). We both have a major interest in diet control, and specifically, we have identified meal planning as an area for service so that we can both eat better. We recently sat down and discussed meal planning, and narrowed it down to the following service dynamic addition:
- Sir requires His boy to create a weekly meal plan and to present it each Sunday at the AM ritual if both Sir and His boy are home.
We kept this service open ended enough where it can evolve over time, and where Sir can dial up or dial down His expectations based on His needs and His boy’s availability. As an example, we didn’t define who cooks the meals so that we can keep this practical and He can layer in future expectations to keep this dynamic interesting. A key takeaway is that service must be practical and requires a lot of discussion, discovery and experimentation to get it dialed in.
And last but not least, it is critical to understand that a D/s dynamic must change over time. Things come up, health issues arise, and being overly rigid can sound hot, but ultimately it can erode headspace and the feeling of engagement. We continue to increase our communication about our health & fitness dynamic, because the more we talk, the deeper we get in the dynamic. His expectations alone aren’t going to make His boy successful – but his willingness to be vulnerable for Sir and to work hard at making incremental improvements is key to realizing our desired outcomes.
What are your successes and failures with measured dynamic outcomes? How have your expectations changed over time as your D/s dynamic evolves?
Written by s37 and approved for posting by Sir Zuegi.
Booted and Bound 
Leave a comment